-- "Don't let people drive you crazy when you know it's in walking distance." --

-- -- Thought of the day -- --

-- “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” ~ Albert Einstein

--------------------------------------------------------------> > It is - What - it is
--> --> --> IDEA ??
"Intellectual knowledge, however, is concerned with the universal. But it must have been derived from the experience of the individual which, therefore, in some way contains the universal. The universal cannot exist, as such, apart from the individual. It is immanent in the individual as the essence, or nature, specifically common to all members of the class. Since this essence, or nature, constitutes the thing specifically what it is, man, horse, triangle, etc., it furnishes the answer to the question: What is the thing? (Quid est?). It has therefore been termed the quiddity of the thing. In Greek, according to Aristotle, the to ti en enai, eidos, morphe, and ousia deutera are one and the same thing — the essence, or quiddity, which determines the specific nature of the thing. This is the foundation for the general concept in the mind, which abstracts the universal form (eidos nonton) from the individual."

---------------------------------------------------------------> > Life is all about how you handle Plan B

-- "Great Thinkers Have Great Minds" -- Mike Wolfe - Frank Fritz - Danielle Colby , American Pickers

-- "Japanese Robot Eats Snow, Poops Out Bricks of Ice" --

-- "Kim Komando's Video of the Day * Blog Archive * Water Painting" --

-- "the [non]billable hour: Advertise, and clean up!" --

-- "Weird Things to know.doc" --

-- "A plague of iPhone flatulence - Apple 2.0" --

-- "Apple Working on 3D 'Hyper-Reality' Displays - Mac Rumors" --

--> "Electronic Nose"

-- DEFINITION: "A Mistress is the subjectively deft conjunction administered between a Mister and his Mattress. This is not to be confused with the cleft definition of Virgin Forest, i.e., "Never been axed."

-- WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONNAIRE?
-- Place in the correct order the following inventions from the earliest to the latest:
A. Paper Clip2 B. Typewriter1
C. Laptop Computer4 D. Xerox Copier3

--> "The typewriter was invented before the fountain pen."
-- The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.

--> "The cigarette lighter was invented before the match."

-- -- "Uses for WD 40.doc" --

-- -- "If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man." --
Mark Twain

-- -- Accidental Inventions -- --

-- "Some of the more interesting stories about new inventions are the ones that are created by accident. An "accidental invention" can be born when one inventor develops a product and another person finds a use for it; it can be developed by one of the largest companies in the world and marketed by an outside entrepreneur after the company fails to find a use for it; or it can simply have an employee change the composition of it by accident and in the process give it its most important attribute."
For exaple: Post-it Notes * Silly Putty * Vulcanized Rubber * Ivory Soap * Slinky * Frisbee *
MarketLaunchers -- Paul Neimann

-- 1, 2, 3, "Guidance, Tools & Manuals" --

-- -- "Who's more foolish -- the fool, or the fool who follows him?" -- Obi Won Kenobi

-- -- "The supreme end of education is expert discernment of all things -- the power to tell the good from the bad, the genuine from the counterfeit and to prefer the good and the genuine to the bad and the counterfeit." -- Samuel Johnson

Contributed by: Dianne WW

Have you ever noticed... that they put advertisements in with your bills now? Like bills aren't distasteful enough, they have to stuff junk mail in there with them..

I get back at them. I put garbage in with my check when I mail it in. Coffee grinds, banana peels... I write, "Could you throw this away for me? Thank You."

On Fabric Softener:

My wife uses fabric softener. I never knew what that stuff was for.. Then I noticed women coming up to me (sniff) 'Married' (walk off). That's how they mark their territory. You can take off the ring, but it's hard to get that April fresh scent out of your clothes.

On Cripes:

My wife's from the Midwest. Very nice people there. Very wholesome.. They use words like 'Cripes'. 'For Cripe's sake.' Who would that be, Jesus Cripe's? The son of 'Gosh' of the church of 'Holy Moly'?

I'm not making fun of it. You think I wanna burn in 'Heck'?

On Morning Differences:

Men and women are different in the morning. The men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you.

And the women are thinking, 'How can he want me the way I look in the morning?'

It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve... it's all in our penis.

On Pregnancy:

It's weird when pregnant women feel the baby kicking. They say, 'Oh my God. He's kicking. Do you wanna feel it?'

I always feel awkward reaching over there. Come on! It's weird to ask someone to feel your stomach. I don't do that when I have gas.

"Oh my God... give me your hand... It won't be long now.....

On Grandma:

My grandmother has a bumper sticker on her car that says, 'Sexy Senior Citizen.'

You don't want to think of your grandmother that way, do you? Out entering wet shawl contests. Makes you wonder where she got that dollar she gave you for your birthday.

On Prisons:

Did you know that it costs forty thousand dollars a year to house each prisoner? Jeez, for forty thousand bucks a piece I'll take a few prisoners into my house. I live in Los Angeles. I already have bars on the windows..

I don't think we should give free room and board to criminals. I think they should have to run twelve hours a day on a treadmill and generate electricity. And if they don't want to run, they can rest in the chair that's hooked up to the generator.

On Award Shows:

Can you believe how many award shows they have now? They have awards for commercials.

The Cleo Awards, a whole show full of commercials. I taped it and then I fast forwarded through the whole thing.

On Phone-In-Polls:

You know those shows where people call in and vote on different issues? Did you ever notice there's always like 18% that say "I don't know." It costs 90 cents to call up and vote... They're voting "I don't know."

"Honey, I feel very strongly about this. Give me the phone. (Into Phone) I DON'T KNOW!" (Hangs up looking proud.)

"Sometimes you have to stand up for what you believe you're not sure about."

This guy probably calls up phone sex girls for $2.95 to say "I'm not in the mood."

On Answering Machine:

Did you ever hear one of these corny, positive messages on someone's answering machine?

"Hi, it's a great day and I'm out enjoying it right now. I hope you are too. The thought for the day is 'Share the love.' Beep."

"Uh, yeah... this is the VD clinic calling.... Speaking of being positive, your test is back. Stop sharing the love."