--> --> Huh? -- You're still reading? -- O.K. --> you've been warned, -- it's your headache. -->
------------------------- ( o o ) -------------------------- ----------> >
Tag - You're it!!

-- "Kids likely to predict future of technology - Tech and gadgets" --
-- The findings are a result of asking kids across the world to draw the answer to this question: "What would you like your computer or the Internet to do that it can’t do right now?"

"Overall, the drawings demonstrated that kids wanted their technology to be more interactive and human, better integrated with their physical lives and empowering to users by assisting new knowledge or abilities.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >
-- The Latest from National Mail Order Association --
--------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >

A salesman telephones a household and a four-year-old answers:

Salesman: "May I speak to your mother?"

Child: "She is not here."

Salesman: "Well, is anyone else there?"

Child: "My sister."

Salesman: "O.K., fine.. may I speak to her?"

Child: "I guess so?"

There is a long silence on the other phone. Then: Child: "Hello.."

Salesman: "It’s you! I thought you were going to call your sister?"

Child: "I did. The trouble is, I can’t get her out of the playpen." :-))

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >

Teacher: "Lenny, how old were you on your very last birthday?"

Lenny: "Seven."

Teacher: "Then how old will you be on your next birthday?"

Lenny: "Nine."

Teacher: "That's impossible!"

Lenny: "No, teacher, I'm 8 today!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >

A young polar bear asks his father, "Dad, am I 100% Polar Bear?"

The father bear responds, "Well, son, I am all polar bear, your mother is all polar bear, your grandparents, even your great grandparents are 100% polar bear. So yes, son, you are 100% polar bear. Why do you ask?"

The young polar bear replies "Because I am really cold!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >
-- "Paddles & Markers | Kleenslate Concepts" --
-- Response Paddles can be used at home for playing games, taking notes, leaving messages, doodling, and much more. About Us | Kleenslate Concepts
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >

 Early one morning, a mother went in to wake up her son. "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!"

"But why, Mom? I don't want to go."

"Give me two reasons why you don't want to go."

"Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!"

"Oh, that's no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready."

"Give me two reasons why I should go to school."

"Well, for one, you're 52 years old. And for another, you're the Principal!"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >
----------------------------> >
-- "A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make."

Response to Debbi Fields' idea of starting Mrs. Fields' Cookies.
----------------------------> >

-- "Kids Pages" -- -- "PBS Electric Money"
-- "By Kids For Kids, Young Inventors and Kid's: How to Invent" --->> "Invention Convention" --

-- "Grow a Sock Garden | Activities | Education.com"
-- This experiment makes a good introduction into the world of hypothesis and predictions, the backbone of later science.

-- "Camp Invention" --
A WEEKLONG SUMMER ENRICHMENT PROGRAM FOR CHILDREN ENTERING GRADES ONE THROUGH SIX

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >

--> A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp between two missing teeth, "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?"

As the shopkeeper's heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he's on her level and asks, "Do you want a widdle white wabbit, or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabbit, or maybe one like that cute widdle bwown wabbit over there?"

She, in turn, blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says, in a quiet voice, "I don't think my python weally gives a thit." ;-))

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >

-- "Correspondence schools are full of it. I saw an ad where they claimed they could teach you veterinarian medicine thought the mail. Hate to be a dog in that house. "Mail's here!" "Yip, yip, yip!" Talk about being a regular in the pet store, "Hey, didn't I already sell you a puppy?" -- Drew Carey

-- Did you hear about the snail that got beat up by two turtles?
-- At the police station they asked him, "Did you get a good look at the turtles that did this?" He said, "No, it all happened so fast."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >

-- "Inventive But Not Inventors - The Next Generation of Inventive Minds" --

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >
-- "free halloween games online mah jong, jigsaw puzzles, sokoban, slider and memory puzzle" --

-- "Children as young as five 'using the internet without parental supervision'" --

-- "Video Games Can Play Havoc With Kids' Joints" -- "The younger the child, the more likely the pain, says research led by an 11-year-old" --

-- "Kids watch more than a day of TV each week" --

-- An honest seven-year-old admitted calmly to her parents that Billy Brown had kissed her after class.
-- "How did that happen?" gasped her mother.
-- "It wasn't easy," admitted the young lady, "but three girls helped me catch him." --

-- "EpiPens emerge as life-saving kid accessory - Kids and parenting" --

-- " Chewing gum, Ivory soap and other accidents - Forbes.com" --

-- "Inventor of the Week" --

-- I found out why there is so much LEAD PAINT in the toys that are made in China: Originally, the toy company told Chinese manufacturers to paint all the toys RED. Because the Chinese interpreter couldn't pronounce 'R' very well, he re-told the workers to paint all the toys 'Led' and the toys were painted with LEAD PAINT. <-- Just a dumb joke, smile :-)

-- "Trouble in Toyland: U.S. recession jolts China - Economy in Turmoil" -- "Others found ways to cut corners, which is cited as one reason that the problem of Chinese toy safety came to a head last year. Among other things, some Chinese factories started using lead-based paint on their products because it dries faster and thereby speeds production time."

-- "China is pitching in for green week. From now on, all toys from China will be made with recycled lead." - Jay Leno Another dumb joke.

-- Information and analysis on hazards of residential lead exposure for children exposed to deteriorating lead-based paint, lead contaminated dust, and lead contaminated residential --

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >

-- YouthBridge SEIC and Skandalaris Seminar Series

Strengthen Your Nonprofit Compete to win your share of $100,000 in seed money!

Register for the YouthBridge Social Enterprise & Innovation Competition (SEIC) and the Washington University Skandalaris Seminar Series

-- Tell me, are you real sure about this?.. I mean about your dumb"idea"? Are you really sure or just crazy? -- You'd better check this out whether it's actually a "CHINDOGU"
-- "Huh? Duh.. What do you mean?" -- "He suggests that you go to the "International Chindogu Society" and Submit that good-dumb idea of yours, right away!" %:-))

-- "CLASSIC CHINDOGUS : International Chindogu Society" --
-- "MORE CLASSIC CHINDOGUS : International Chindogu Society" --

>> How about this one: A dog leashwith a clip-on pair of gloves for the owner to always find his gloves. He sure can't lose one because it clips to the other.. and Spot, his dog, will always find his leash to have his master take him out for a walk :-))

>> And here's another: You know how a man's suit has a lapel pocket to hold a dress handkerchief.. Well, why not make a dress handkerchief, like they do for a fitted sheet, with that extra tuck material that fits over a mattress? Then, a man can tuck inside his lapel pocket a tissue inside this dress handkerchief, in order to blow his nose when he has a sneezing emergency! [Yeah, I guess it IS a Chindogu..??]

==============================================
A dog went to a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog, "There are only nine words here. You could send another 'Woof' for the same price." The dog replied, "But that would make no sense at all!"
==============================================

-- "What Can and Cannot be Patented" --

-- One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, ".... and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, "The sky is falling, the sky is falling!"

-- The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?"

-- One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: 'Holy Mackerel! A talking chicken!'"

-- The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------> >
Q: If you have 4 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 3 apples and 4 oranges in the other, what do you have?
A: Very large hands!!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------> >

Guidance Counselor: " Where do you see yourself in ten years?"
Student: " In a mirror...duh."

Q: Why did the parrot wear a raincoat?
A: He wanted to be a polyunsaturated!

Q. Did you hear the Energizer Bunny Was Arrested?
A: Charged With Battery!

-- -- Thought of the day --

-- "We are all born with wonderful gifts. We use these gifts to express ourselves, to amuse, to strengthen, and to communicate. We begin as children to explore and develop our talents, often unaware that we are unique, that not everyone can do what we're doing!" -- Lynn Johnston (1947 - )

Subject: free movie websites

 1. http://theflickfanatic.com/ click on Karl's swag bag

2. http://wearemoviegeeks.com/

-- "10 free iPhone and iPod touch apps - Tips and Advice for Parents and Families - The Kim Komando Radio Show"

-- "Invent Now | Programs | Inspiring Invention" --> ---> ----> ----> ------> -------> --------> ------>
-- Leonardo DaVinci -- "Leonardo's Mysterious Machinery"

-- "I was like a boy playing on the sea-shore, and diverting myself now and then finding a smoother pebble or a prettier shell than ordinary, whilst the great ocean of truth lay all undiscovered before me." --
-- Isaac Newton

-- "kids fly swatter play-station" --

-- "Camp Invention" --

-- A Sunday school teacher was teaching her class about the difference between right and wrong.

-- "All right children, she said, here is another example. If I were to get into a man's pocket and take his billfold with all his money, what would I be?"

-- Little Johnny raises his hand, and with a confident smile he blurts out, "You'd be his wife!"

-- "Amazon.com: Accidents May Happen (50 Inventions Discovered By Mistake)" --

-- "Muzz.com > Charlie Chaplin" --

-- "School buses test fingerprint scan" --

-- "Emily, Jacob most popular baby names" --

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >
"Well, Ted, you're certainly coming up in the world. What's the idea of playing golf with not one, but two caddies!"

"Oh, it was my wife's idea."

"Your wife?"

"Yeah," answers Ted, "She thought I should spend more time with the kids."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------> >

-- "Ben's Guide to U.S. Government for Kids" --

-- Invention Mysteries are based on Paul Niemann's syndicated newspaper column which has appeared in more than 80 newspapers. Please visit www.inventionmysteries.com today to see a few samples and place your order.

-- "Video games are good for children - EU report"

-- "Parental controls for video game systems - Tips and Advice for Parents and Families - The Kim Komando Radio Show" --
-- "Is your child's school any good? - Tips and Advice for Parents and Families" --

---------------------------------------------------------> >
-- "Welcome to Tech Ed Concepts, Inc" --
---------------------------------------------------------> >
-- "Welcome to Rapman - Distributed by: Technology Education Concepts, Inc., North American Academic Distributor" --
---------------------------------------------------------> >
-- -- Thought of the day:

-- "When life gives you a rainy day, play in the puddles....complaining and whining won't bring you back the sunshine!" --

Our six-year-old daughter, Terra, has a need to ask questions...lots of questions. Finally, one day, my wife had it.

"Have you ever heard that curiosity killed the cat?" my wife asked.

"No," replied Terra.

"Well, there was a cat, and he was very inquisitive. And one day, he looked into a big hole, fell in, and died!"

Wide-eyed, Terra whispered: "What was in the hole?"

-- -- "National Museum of Education" "The National Gallery for America's Young Inventors™ is the only nationally recognized HALL OF FAME FOR STUDENT INVENTORS, established in 1993 and given permission by the adult National Inventors Hall of Fame Board in Washington, D.C. to archive and enshrine great student inventions and inventors K-12."

-- "Edmund Scientific: educational toys, gifts, hobby supplies & science equipment" --

-- "Interactive and Educational Products for Children, Music, Draw and Sing" --

-- A kindergarten teacher handed out a coloring page to her class. On it was a picture of a duck holding an umbrella. The teacher told her class to color the duck in yellow and the umbrella green, however, Bobby, the class rebel, colored the duck in a bright fire truck red. After seeing this, the teacher asked him: "Bobby, how many times have you seen a red duck?" Young Bobby replied with "The same number of times I've seen a duck holding an umbrella."

-- "Thinking Fountain: Theme Clusters" --

-- "How to Make a Kool Aid Purse" --

-- "Kid inventors get creative with Bubble Wrap - Innovation - MSNBC.com" --
==========================================
President Bush signed into law on Thursday, September 27, 2007 a federal student aid program which some have labeled the most significant higher education initiative since the G.I. Bill.

The College Cost Reduction Act of ...2007 (H.R. 2669, which won overwhelming majorities in the House and via conference report to the Senate, provides for three major actions: increasing the maximum Pell grant award; capping the loan repayment terms at 15% of discretionary income; and creating a debt-forgiveness program for public-sector employees, including those working for nonprofit organizations. For more information, visit the House Committee on Education and Labor
==========================================
-- "St. Louis University High School - Inventors'/ Robotics Club" --

-- "7 video games kids should not play - Tips and Advice for Parents and Families - The Kim Komando Radio Show" --

-- "10 kid-friendly games - Tips and Advice for Parents and Families - The Kim Komando Radio Show" --

-- "Write Intelligently in Your Corporate Communication: Three Tips" --
-- "When Ken Burns' 1990 documentary, The Civil War, first aired, many viewers commented on the astonishingly literate and grammatically perfect letters written home by soldiers who had no formal schooling beyond the age of ten or twelve. In the nineteenth century, education was a serious and intensive process, and people were expected to continue learning all their lives through reading, conversation, and study."

--> You might find out that you are smarter than you think you are?? Ha! --> Oh, really!? Then do this one: --> It will tell you who you really are and what you've been hiding: --> {:-8

- for you are being lead down the Primrose Path. --
I warn you, don't even think that you can understand the statements within "WAIS DOCUMENT RETRIEVEL" - and
"ANNALS OF IMPROBABLE RESEARCH" @ --> AIR

--> Relaxed enough? Then take our sweet pre-quizz and have a bite from a candybar: -- go to: --> Umm Good

-- One day a man is walking down the street when he sees an old man with a nice looking dog. He goes over to the man and asks, "Does your dog bite?"
-- The old man replies, "No never."
-- When the man bends down to stroke the dog it immediately takes a snap at his hand.
-- The man says, "I thought you said your dog did not bite!"
-- "I did," replies the old man, "but this isn't my dog!"

-- Now to: --> A page of Mumbo Jumbo <-- THIS IS YOUR TEST. NOW TAKE IT! See if you can decode it.

>--> REMEMBER: -- IDEA -- RESEARCH -- DEVELOPMENT -- FORTUNE --> YOUR FUTURE
>>> --> Jellybread Patent Information --

DR. GERTRUDE ELION: Because I'm very interested in teaching people about what science has done for them and what it can do. Without an educated populace, there will be no support for basic research. People tend not to support what they don't understand. I particularly want to reach out to young people. In fact, I am out talking to them constantly, trying to make them realize how thrilling science can be and how fulfilling it is to be able to cure sick people. I don't think anyone tells them that. I think we need to.

-- "Made For Mom (home of The Snack-Trap) Parent Invented Products" --

-- "4 fun steps to building block 6 - early math the right way" --

---------------------------------------------------
-- -- Thought of the day --

-- "It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer." -- Albert Einstein
---------------------------------------------------

-- "Technology reshapes America's classrooms | Reuters" --

-- "Social websites harm children's brains: --
-- > > Chilling warning to parents from top neuroscientist" -- "A study by the Broadcaster Audience Research Board found teenagers now spend seven-and-a-half hours a day in front of a screen."

-- An inventor is persistent and never gives up. ;-) Go to: www.InventNet.com

-- "In 1951, Mr. Potato Head was the first toy to be advertised on television."

-- "7 video games kids should not play - Tips and Advice for Parents and Families" --

-- "In the confrontation between the stream and the rock, the stream always wins - not through strength but by perseverance." -- H. Jackson Brown, Author of Life's Little Instruction Book

-- -- Financial Future Challenge --- "BKFK Competition - The NYSE Financial Future Challenge, sponsored by the New York Stock Exchange Foundation and K12 - Kids Inventing Financial Solutions" --
-- "Learn How to Enter [NYSE Financial Future for Say It] at Idea Locker BKFK" --

-- "Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly." -- John F. Kennedy

-- -- Thought of the day --

-- "Perhaps the most valuable result of all education is the ability to make yourself do the thing you have to do, when it ought to be done, whether you like it or not." --

Thomas Huxley 1825-1895, Biologist and Educator

-- "An Easy Way to Donate Unwanted Gift Cards to Schools" -- "DonorsChoose.org: An online charity connecting you to classrooms in need"

-- "Deseret News | Universities will be 'irrelevant' by 2020, Y. professor says" --

-- "MBA Exam Tester Tosses Scores Over Web Cheating" --

-- "Wireless services add more parental controls - Back to School - ]MSNBC.com" --

-- "My Way News - No texting at dinner! Parenting in the digital era" --

-- -- Writing Home --

Dear Dad,

$chool i$ really great. I am making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying very hard. With all my $tuff, I $imply can't think of anything I need, $o if you would like, you can ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.

Love,

Your $on

-------------
The Reply:
--------------

Dear Son,

I kNOw that astroNOmy, ecoNOmics, and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.

-- "Komando.com, Website for The Kim Komando Radio Show, Komando Kids" --

-->> "Entrepreneurship"

--> "Fast Track Derby Homestead" --> -->

~ A nursery school driver was delivering a van full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog’s duties.
~ ‘They use him to keep crowds back,’ said Tommy.
~ ‘No,’ said Billy, ‘he’s just for good luck.’
~ Peter brought the argument to a close. ‘They use the dogs, he said firmly, to find the fire hydrants….'

--> Had enough yet? -- Give up? --> O.K. -- Read, "Galileo" 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Strange Thoughts

1. Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.

2. If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide is that considered a hostage situation?

3. Just think how much deeper the ocean would be if sponges didn't live there.

4. If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

5. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

6. If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

7. I went for a walk last night, and my kids asked me how long I'd be gone. I said, "The whole time."

8. So what's the speed of dark?

9. How come you don't ever hear about gruntled employees? And who has been dissing them anyhow?

10. After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?

11. Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?

12. If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?

13. I just got skylights put in my place. The people who live above me are furious.

14. Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

15. Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?

16. Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

17. If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

19. Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?

20. Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?

21. Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?

22. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

23. If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?

24. Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is weak?

25. Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers?

26. Why are they called buildings, when they're already finished? Shouldn't they be called builts?

27. Why are they called apartments, when they're all stuck together?

28. Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?

29. If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?

30. If you got into a taxi and the driver started driving backward, would the taxi driver end up owing you money?

31. What would a chair look like if your knees bent the other way?

32. If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?

33. Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?

34. When two airplanes almost collide why do they call it a near miss? It sounds like a near hit to me!

35. Do fish get cramps after eating?

36. Why are there 5 syllables in the word "monosyllabic"?

37. Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?

38. Why do scientists call it research when looking for something new?

39. If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

40. When I erase a word with a pencil, where does it go?

41. Why is it, when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open, it's not a door?

42. Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.

43. How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a chair at him?

44. If "con" is the opposite of "pro," then what is the opposite of progress?

45. Why is it lemon juice contains mostly artificial ingredients, but dishwashing liquid contains real lemons?

46. Why buy a product that it takes 2000 flushes to get rid of?

47. Why do we wait until a pig is dead to "cure" it?

48. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

49. Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase?

50. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

51. Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?

52. What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?

53. Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

54. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

55. Should you trust a stockbroker who's married to a travel agent?

56. Is boneless chicken considered to be an invertebrate?

57. Do married people live longer than single people, or does it just SEEM longer?

58. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

59. If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?

60. Isn't the best way to save face to keep the lower part shut?

61. War doesn't determine who's right, just who's left.

During a terrible storm, all the highway signs were covered with snow. The following spring, the state decided to raise all the signs twelve inches at a cost of six million dollars. "That's an outrageous price!" said a local farmer, "but I guess we're lucky the state handled it instead of the federal government." "Why's that?" "Because knowing the federal government, they'd decided to lower the highways."

In a grammar lesson in eighth grade Mrs. O'Neill said, "Paul, give me a sentence with a direct object."

Paul replied. "Everyone thinks you are the best teacher I the school."

"Thank you, Paul," responded Mrs. O'Neill, "but what is the object?"

"To get the best mark possible," said Paul If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you!

A preacher was standing at the pulpit giving his Sunday sermon when a note was passed to him. The only word written on the sheet was IDIOT. Looking up at the congregation, the preacher smiled and said: I have heard of men who write letters and forget to sign their names but this is the first time I will see a man sign his name and forget to write the letters.

Thought of the day

"Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow where they lead."

Louisa May Alcott 1832-1888, Author

He kept sticking his nose into everybody's business!!

-- "The Official Billy-Bob Teeth, Inc. Website"

-- You will have suffered enough taking the above test. --> Welcome to Our Club. You'll give the lecture on what you think you have found out at an upcoming meeting.

-- -- "No pressure, no diamonds." -- Mary Case

Ha ha Gotcha -- Riddle: This well known invention was named for nothing when it was invented in 1907. What is it?

-- -- "Celebrating the Spirit of Innovation at The Great Idea Finder"

-- -- To get our readers to read much further, -- we FIRST have to get their attention. --

-- "Black History Inventors - Black History Month - African American Inventors"

-- "Chicago 1st Black Inventors Entrepreneurs Organziation, NFP" --

--- Current Events --
Teacher: President Barack Obama will be the first Afro-American to serve as U.S. President.
Little Jimmy raises his hand.
Teacher: Yes, Jimmy..
Jimmy (smiling): He'll be the second one. President George Washington was Black!
Teacher: Now Jimmy, you know better than that. George Washington was a White man.
Jimmy: Well, every Washington I've come to know and played with was Black!!

_____October - National Cyber Security Awareness Month >> Cybercrime is on the rise and President Obama has officially declared October as "National Cyber Security Awareness Month".

-- -- Barach Obama Speech --

"But to truly transform our economy, protect our security, and save our planet from the ravages of climate change, we need to ultimately make clean, renewable energy the profitable kind of energy. So I ask this Congress to send me legislation that places a market-based cap on carbon pollution and drives the production of more renewable energy in America. And to support that innovation, we will invest fifteen billion dollars a year to develop technologies like wind power and solar power; advanced biofuels, clean coal, and more fuel-efficient cars and trucks built right here in America."

-- "Obama, McCain stretch facts in debate - The Debates - MSNBC.com" --

--> > > "Palintology | Bad Astronomy | Discover Magazine" - Sarah Palin, who was John McCain's Vice president pick, is an interesting case..."

-- "NYT: McCain, Obama differ on innovation - The New York Times - MSNBC.com" -- 'Among other things, it proposed that the government finance 10,000 scholarships for math and science teaching careers and 30,000 scholarships for college-level study of science, math and engineering; increase the basic research budget by 10 percent a year for seven years; and establish programs to make broadband available nationwide at low cost.'

-- "McCain Proposes a $300 Million Prize for a Next-Generation Car Battery - NYTimes.com"

-- -- QUOTE OF THE WEEK ...

-- "Everyone who got where he is had to begin where he was" -- Pope John Paul II

-- "We don't work for each other, We work with each other." - Unknown

-- "Toys -- and More -- for the 21st Century Make Use of Mind Control Over Matter" --

-- Ronald McDonald is the second most recognised advertised image by children next to Santa Clause. --

-- Outer Space is where it's at. Look to the Heavens.

-- “Last week the shuttle went up to fix the Hubble Space Telescope. And now, when they finished up, they put a sticker on the telescope that says, ‘Objects may be closer than they appear.’” -– David Letterman

--- An "Older than Dirt" Joke:

-- Two elderly women were talking. One had her pre-teen daughter standing beside her. One woman was making the point to the other, that the person in question in their conversation was very rich.. She said to the other woman, "He's got more money than Carter has pills!"

-- Her daughter pipes up, "Carter don't have Pills, he's got peanuts!"

-- Do you get it? : Well, there was a heavily advertised product called "Carters Little Liver Pills." The girl was referring to James Earl Carter, President Jimmy Carter, who owned a Peanut Farm. :-)) They also say: "When you have to explain a joke, it ain't funny."

-- "Never wait in line at the museum again - Destinations - MSNBC.com" --

-- -- "WHTour : The UNESCO World Heritage Sites in Panography and Virtual Reality Tours"

-- -- The expression "The sky's the limit" was first said in Don Quixote, by Cervantes. [Coast to Coast]

-- "Right now I'm not having an out-of-body experience, I'm having an out of money experience."

-- "Leaving The Body Behind" --

-- "Probe photos of Apollo landing sites reveal man DID walk on the Moon" --

-- "Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to? -- :-)

-- "Subject: Why the world will NOT end in 2012: Nasa scientist debunks internet rumours" --

-- "Journal of Applied Treknology - Index"

-- "HamiltonBook.com - New Books at Bargain Prices! - Scientific Research & Technology" --
=========================================
The Federal Grants and Loans Catalog is now available. This publication contains more than 5000 financial programs, subsidies, scholarships, grants and loans offered by the US federal government and various foundations and associations across the United States. That is over 2200 pages of information !!!

Contents of the Catalog:

Federal agency administering a program Authorization upon which a program is based
Objectives and goals of a program
Types of financial assistance offered under a program
Uses and restrictions placed upon a program
Eligibility requirements
Application and award process
Regulations, guidelines and literature relevant to a program
Information contacts at the headquarters, regional, and local offices
Programs that are related based upon program objectives and uses

Programs in the Catalog provide a wide range of benefits and services, which have been grouped into 20 basic functional categories, and 176 subcategories that identify specific areas of interest. - Listed below are the 20 basic categories in which all programs have been grouped by primary purpose.

Agriculture
Business and Commerce
Community Development
Consumer Protection
Cultural Affairs
Disaster Prevention and Relief
Education
Employment, Labor and Training
Energy
Environmental Quality
Food and Nutrition
Health
Housing
Income Security and Social Services
Information and Statistics
Law, Justice, and Legal Services
Natural Resources
Regional Development
Science and Technology
Transportation

CD version: $69.95
Printed version: $149.95

To order please call: 1 800 610 4543

Please reply to webmaster@usgrantsguide.info for assistance.
=========================================

-- "Get a world-class education for free - Cool Sites from The Kim Komando Radio Show? & Web site" --

-- -- "The Stories of George the Hamster"

-- As scientists and concerned citizens, we applaud the recent trend towards legislation which requires the prominent placing of warnings on products that present hazards to the general public. Yet we must also offer the cautionary thought that such warnings, however well-intentioned, merely scratch the surface of what is really necessary in this important area. This is especially true in light of the findings of 20th century physics.

We therefore propose that the following list of warnings appears on every product offered for sale in the United States.

WARNING: This Product Warps Space and Time in Its Vicinity.

CAUTION: The Mass of This Product Contains the Energy Equivalent of 85 Million Tons of TNT per Net Ounce of Weight.

HANDLE WITH EXTREME CARE: This Product Contains Minute Electrically Charged Particles Moving at Velocities in Excess of Five Hundred Million Miles Per Hour.

CONSUMER NOTICE: Because of the "Uncertainty Principle," It Is Impossible for the Consumer to Find Out at the Same Time Both Precisely Where This Product Is and How Fast It Is Moving. (Note: This one is optional on the grounds that Heisenburg was never quite sure that his principle was correct)

ADVISORY: There is an Extremely Small but Nonzero Chance That, Through a Process Know as "Tunneling," This Product May Spontaneously Disappear from Its Present Location and Reappear at Any Random Place in the Universe, Including Your Neighbor's Domicile. The Manufacturer Will Not Be Responsible for Damages or Inconvenience That May Result.

ATTENTION: Despite Any Other Listing of Product Contents Found Hereon, the Consumer is Advised That, in Actuality, This Product Consists Of 99.999999999% Empty Space.

PLEASE NOTE: Some Quantum Physics Theories Suggest That When the Consumer Is Not Directly Observing This Product, It May Cease to Exist or Will Exist Only in a Vague and Undetermined State.